Losing the Butterflies

Competition is rapidly approaching (one week from Sunday!). Last year, I was a ball of nerves. This year, I am suprised with how calm and unconcerned I am.

Don’t get me wrong, I want to do well – at least well for me. I am just not as worked up this year as I was last. I am sure that has to do with having competed once before. I know what to expect. I also know that seeing the Texas regionals at the women’s retreat this year helped me a lot. Gaining the perspective of an audience member has helped me be less afraid. Seeing it from the audience perspective has taught me how truly beautiful these routines are. Yes, even if you fall you are still beautiful. I get that now. I did not last year.

At the end of class the other day, the stuido owner asked the competitors who were there if we would come to the front and demonstrate our routines for the class. I loved this idea. Any extra experience I can get is good, I think. She had not, of course, told us in advance that she planned to ask us this. I thought that was a good idea. No need to be thinking about my routine while I am taking class. Also, when I took class I took class. I didn’t slack off or anything trying to save energy for my routine.

There were three of us that did the demonstration. Myself, one woman (who placed fourth last year at the regionals), and one male (who placed first at regionals and then 13th or 14th at nationals). The studio owner pointed this out – as she should because they are amazing accomplishments – and then asked me what place I came in last year.

“Last,” is what I said in a joking tone. Everyone laughed and she assured me I did not come in last place.

Truth: I have no idea where I placed last year because I didn’t want to know. I just did the competition and moved on. Is it possible I came in last? Oh yeah, it’s possible.

But no matter. I got to the front of the room with these fabulous competitors, tuned them out, and did my thing. Do you know how hard it is to do your routine immediately following class? Very hard is the answer. I was out of breath. I thought I might pass out in rabbit.

However, I noticed that I was not bothered to do my routine. I did have a bit of shaking going on, because I was tired, but I did pretty well. I got my head on my knee (I swear that is all that matters to me lately) so I was fine when I crash landed my standing bow. My two advanced postures, upward stretching and lifting lotus, were good. I am not concerning myself with smashing my face to my legs in upward stretching. I just lock my knees and balance. On this day, I was able to balance indefinitely. Lifting lotus was ok, but I had already done it three times before class. My fingers were done in, so I just pushed up off my hands. Did you know you can push up off your hands for competition and not your fingers? You will get points deducted, but you can push up off your hands and still get points. Just saying.

Anyways, if you’re nervous to compete let me say that the first time is scary, but I am hopeful this year will be more fun. It’s certainly panning out that way,


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. LeighAHall (@LeighAHall)
    Oct 14, 2014 @ 05:20:35

    Losing the Butterflies http://t.co/pqfTlErqFp #bikramyoga #yogaholicsmag


  2. LeighAHall (@LeighAHall)
    Nov 30, 2014 @ 01:36:46

    Losing the Butterflies http://t.co/pqfTlFie3B #bikramyoga #yogaholicsmag


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