In my last post, I shared my difficulties with getting rejected. The night the rejection came, I spent very little time sleeping (about five hours). I feel asleep around 1:00 am and was up by 6:00 am.
I decided I needed to go to the 9:00 class that day. I knew it would be a good idea for me to get out of the house and stop my pity party. I didn’t say I wanted to go to class. I said I needed to go to class.
When I arrived I had decided how class was going to be. It consisted of the following:
(a) I will set up in the back of the room away from everyone.
(b) I will sit out a lot of postures. I showed up. What more do you want from me?
Here’s what actually happened:
I arrived to find a super smiley, happy yoga buddy set up in the front row. That’s the exact opposite place I wanted to be, but I set up next to her. I just wanted to be next to her. I instantly knew being next to her would be good for me. I was not wrong.
I did not sit out a single posture. In fact, I found myself really pushing myself and having a great class. Yes, I fell out of postures (like SH2K and Standing Bow), but I stayed in postures even when I wanted to come out. It was like my brain had cleared out a bit if that makes sense.
In the very first set of hands to feet pose I wanted to come out early. There was no reason for me to come out early. I just didn’t feel like doing the posture anymore. I recognized this and told myself to stay in it. I did. And that’s how class went (including stupid camel which
I held the full time with my hands on my heels for both sets which I NEVER do because, well, I hate stupid camel).
I also had a break through in balancing stick. For some reason, for awhile now, I just cannot balance very well on my left leg. Can’t figure it out. But today, I don’t know, my mind had just gone quiet. So when I set up that first set for balancing on my left leg, I fell out BUT I noticed why. My foot was rolling inward.
Second set, I started to have the same problem. However, this time I was ready for it. I paid attention to my foot. As it started to roll inward, I caught it and corrected it without losing my balance. I held it the entire time.
It was the weirdest and greatest class all at the same time. Which of course, just goes to show you that no matter how we think class is going to go, that’s just not always the case. I was reminded of the importance of letting class unfold and going with what it brings. I was also reminded of the simple joy a yoga buddy can bring simply by being next to me. Sometimes, the best support you can give someone is to simply practice next to them.